The motionless dread in bed lasted an eternity to a mind that couldn't begin to process anything it had heard or seen, all knowing that once it could, my head would destroy itself, identity to a closure. What would become of myself once my purpose was sealed away? To climb the ranks again would not be difficult -- my role would forever be known, but the role was one I adored, wrapped around my claws like ribbons, and now had to cut myself, as if opening a new chapter to my life, which I now wasted merely staring away towards a blank ceiling, room, everything. And my only chance to stop it was thwarted as fast as I went towards it. Perhaps they knew what I had planned, a potential for revolt and revolution. They knew that I was going to rebel, and in advance, and how would they know? I am a pawn underneath the men never seen, and I am their icon to jostle when someone needs to cheer for the city. I am needed and disposable at the same time, and once I stepped out of line, I was met with violence and sedative. I wanted to be more. I wanted to be somebody more, more than anytime else I had wanted to be somebody. I'd start a revolution and lead the world towards peace. I was Her chosen one, after all. Everything is in place, and...
"You can bring your fate back into place," and it's her again. The fish. Ever since everybody's passed her off as a normal companion, she's been talking to me. Mostly just simple get-to-know-me, but the fish' jaws never moved while it spoke to me. She's nice enough, and...
"Isn't that all you want, after all? Your city to be your home, embracing you forever like a mother's arms. I believe we can set on this together."
"Is that...so?
Her voice was like the shattering of a lightbulb, and the dragging of one's hands on the floor as they got dragged away. Truly horrible, but the only horrible thing about her. Could be the way she acts, everything could be worse. But in this moment of isolation, the fish was the only one who checked up on me. I only left my grief to grab a bite once or twice a day, if I could even manage that. Everything else was a sweet, sickening dwelling on a truth I couldn't even grasp, and...
"Just follow what you wish for, and I will guide you towards that."