under construction at an unfortunate cliffhanger at the moment. this lawbot webmaster is working hard to bring this page to justice.
Her Secretary, Judy Judkins
I think if I had enough things to say about Judy to make an entire page on this shrine for it, I would, but maybe later. However, in my opinions, there is no even slightly in-depth discussion about Diane without her secretary being brought up at least once. These two are like a package deal to me in a way. Anyways, here's Judy Judkins, the secretary of the Lawbot Department, going back to since when John Robolts was still a hired part of the company. She's a uniquely-hairstyled Needlenose that also happens to give the Directives that are used as tasks in-game to promote your Executive Suit Disguise after you unlock the Overclocked CLO.
I really wish there were more Judy fans because, despite her relevance only appearing late-game and for a few tasks, she's absolutely full of charm if you have a taste for the Bitchy Gossipy Secretary Stereotype. Fortunately, I do. She's well written for that small role, makes an appearance in both of the bigger comics covered down below this segment on this page -- she's the only secretary of a department that you can actually see in-game yet, though she does talk about the others -- confirming the suit type of the Sellbot secrertary (Janet) and also gossiping about her and also Jennifer (Boardbot) and Jason (Bossbot). I won't go entirely in on her Directives related dialogues, but she's certainly a type of girl, and probbaly carrying like half the department. Thank you Judy. Love you Judy (NO HOMO IM WITH YOUR BOSS)
Now, onto what may be one of my favorite pieces of throwaway lore and one of the most obscure ones, that may or may not (definetly) was me poking and prodding for one. At one point, Twitch streamer Smirky was doing a stream at an European convention with a guest -- the Technical/Community Lead of Corporate Clash, Sheriff Cranky. There were a few questions answered over a stream or two, including this, which I happened to clip.
Now, since the accent and microphone make it a little less clear, here's a general transcription, or in case you fucking hate videos and whimsy and joy.
"So, Lawbots themselves are pretty [i cannot make this word out] types, but the CLO, Diane, and Judy, they get along very well, and Diane will actually shoo away unwanted Lawbots when they swamp Judy or anything."
This tiny tidbit of lore confirming that Diane has at least one actually ok coworker that she tolerates is the world to me, actually. This is everything. Godspeed you lucky bastard Judy.
Lawfice Space
The CLO's first appearance in Corporate Clash as a whole was not in the update itself, but through a story teaser in the form of the Corporate Clash comics. Lawfice Space covers the interview process of a few cogs that weren't cut for the position, and can be read here. The cast of interesting designs never to be seen again include a Saul Goodman expy in the form of an anthromorphic snake cog, some edgy cube that really should've had context, and. Hey. That's not a cog. Robert Cyger you blind fuck.
And here is the first appearance of literally anything Diane related, ever -- her throwing a Toon in disguise out of a window. These pages are actually cut down a bit -- there's at least six in the whole process.
Honestly, could not have asked for anything else to be her introduction to the game. It's a little funny, and also...she's immedietly introduced as competent. Even writing that puts my heart in a little bit of a swoon.
Now, the information given about her in Lawfice Space, while mostly not very useful, is still very interesting just for being mentioned.
What do you mean she was manufactured in Chicago hello what does she have the accent Corporate Clash lorewriters please respond back about this.
Also, the entire gimmick for her in this comic is that they never show her face. They refer to her with feminine pronouns, but other than that, her appearance is shown as the same and unguessable form as any other Department Head, and if her face should be in the frame, it's hidden with an object. Which is good enough, but leads to some pretty strange composition. Whatever, hired out of being the most competent in an interview process where she would've swept the floor anyways.
Hired Help
Hired Help is the comic that, like the last one, preluded an update -- this time, introducing the Litigation Team, and with them, of course, comes the ringleader of them all -- also known as my motherfucking girlfriend Diane Morsecode. You can read it here. As a note, please actually read the comics it's why I don't put a lot of the pages from them on here -- spoiler-free reading !! For one, the art's a lot more polished in this one. Good for them. Starts with some post-operation Break The Law pages, including an interesting tidbit -- the height of Elvis on the missing toon page can be used to semi-accurately calculate heights for most in-game characters (5'2"). But that's besides the point. Look at Judy and Diane at that big table. Watch them while I go take a smoke break.
Back from the smoke break. Thank you. Carrying on.
Always thought the way the Litigation Team was introduced here like a Smash Bros. trailer was unintentionally the funniest shit. I once spent an entire high borderline on tears because Mundie looks unnaturally soft in there. This comic means the world to be besides that. The way they draw Diane here is...like. Everything in a way and also a little off-model but it's ok her actual model is so chin and the comics do it a bit more justice than in-game somehow? Like she still has a defined facial shape. Long. Just not yuri-chin.
Also, her confusing Scapegoat as a child worker (?!) because of his last name being "Kidd" (...goat? he's just a goat) plays into one of my more projecting headcanons of Diane, but that's for the headcanons page.
Diane compilation. If you even care.
The Shorter Comics
Backstage Newsposts
Misc.
note for later -- cover the gag randomizer event here as well
Outlinks
